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2022 Zephyrus G15 System-Wide Stutter

Level 7
Ever since my purchase (In June 2022), my 2022 Zephyrus GA503RM has been experiencing a system-wide stutter. It doesn't matter what I'm doing (Gaming, YouTube, listening to music, browsing). Sometimes it happens a few times per-day. Sometimes it happens many times per-hour. Audio, display, and input (Mouse and keyboard) freeze for about 1 second when this happens. I read about several other people experiencing a similar system-wide stutter in the Zephyrus series and other AMD-based ROG:

None of the suggested fixes are helping. I deleted the Armoury Crate mobile plugin executable. The stutter happens whether or not I have Armoury Crate running. It doesn't matter which profile I'm using either (Managed by Windows or Armoury Crate).

I also read about this:

but my BIOS does not have an option to disable TPM. I haven't yet return the laptop because I hoped Asus would release a BIOS update to fix the issue. After all, how could they leave such a terrible bug in a brand new model? After installing several BIOS updates since my purchase though, I'm nearing the end of my rope.

My current BIOS version: GA503RM.310

I have tried every BIOS update since June and none of them helped. I have tried reinstalling Armoury Crate, installing the AMD provided drivers, and none of that helped either. What am I to do now? RMA?

Edit: Found a megathread:

Asus: Please send a BIOS update to fix this. It's too much.